Wednesday, December 28, 2011

2011 - A Year in Review

 

Okay, here is is....  The 2011 Recap of this crazy family - as told by our (mine and Kurt's) Facebook status updates.  
 
(Please don't judge....)



JANUARY

I’m watching a fight take place between Kurt and the Blue-Ray player.  The issue is over the volume.  The bass just got so loud that the windows are about to shatter.  Kurt just threw down and said he would have to ((gulp)) read.the.manual.  Blue-Ray player: 1; Kurt: 0.
 
Today’s word of encouragement:  No matter how much you love and care for an animal, given the opportunity, it would eat you.
 
Want to give a shout out to the uber-creepy guy in the parking garage (the DARK and ABANDONED parking garage) who thought it would be helpful to RUN DIRECTLY AT ME to let me know that the dome light in my car was still on (you know, the kind that shuts off automatically).  Thank you also for not taking it personally when my “gratitude” included the phrase “stinkin’ idiot.”
 
FEBRUARY
Hope’s friend Mia is spending the night.  Jack just proposed to her.
 
Hope and I were driving home from church.  Kurt and Jack pull up beside us at a stop light.  Kurt gives me the “I’m so awesome” look.  The light turns green and we drive away.  Hope asks what the look was about and I told her that Daddy was trying to be cool.  Hope said, “Oh yeah.  Nothing is cooler than a man driving a mini-van with a little boy in the backseat watching a princess movie.  That’s realllly cool.”
 
Jack has named his brain Kevin.  Kevin comes and goes as he pleases.
 
MARCH
"Daddy, are pigs made out of bacon?”
 
Kurt and Hope are playing chess.  Jack and I wanted to participate so I told Hope to move one of her little prawns and Jack keeps shouting “King me!”  We’ve now been vanquished to Jack’s room to play bingo.  Apparently the chess-playing smarty-pants need it quiet.  Sigh…. Intellectuals.
 
The kids are getting older.  Hope takes 25 minute long showers and Jack has announced that he’s changing his name to Sonic.
 
APRIL
Signing off as an RGI/TDC employee for the last time… It’s been quite a ride.  12 years… As of Monday, it’s all Digital Felt Productions – woot-woot!
 
Hope got the part she wanted in her little school play.  Very excited for her!
 
Good Friday… a time to be thankful.  ♥
 
MAY
My little man Jack is 5 years old today!  ♥
 
Jack and I had a really long talk tonight.  Seriously, I think we talked for over an hour (which is an ETERNITY for a 5 year old).  I feel like we really made some progress – really broke through some barriers – really go the heart of some issues – and made a connection.  Of course the conversation would have been much more meaningful to me if I gave a rip about Super Mario Brothers…
 
So thankful for great times with great friends…

JUNE

The junk drawers in my kitchen won’t close anymore.  I think it’s time to escalate to a junk cupboard.
 
So Hope (who is 9) and I are having a talk. ME: Hope, you can’t date till you’re… HOPE: I know, till I’m 45.  ME: You know I’m just kidding when I say that, right?  HOPE: Yea.  ME: We’ll probably let you double date when you’re 15. You know what that is?  HOPE: Is that with two guys?!
 
It’s really hard to ignore the kids when they keep repeating themselves.

JULY

I ♥ UGSFAW
 
So I’m playing the board game LIFE with Jack and he starts warning me about the importance of buying car insurance because (and I quote) “you never know when some bozo is going to get in front of the wheel.”  In other news, I find myself getting a little bit weepy at the birth of all three of his LIFE babies.
 
Just for today, I choose to believe that there is some (however miniscule) nutritional value in Cocoa Puffs.
 
AUGUST
“Daddy, I don’t think Mom would appreciate you showing us how to do that.”
 
Just saw a lawyer commercial in which they were interviewing a client about his “fatal accident.”  I guess zombies need lawyers too.
 
Jack just saw a police car, but the words “police car” seemed to evade him, so he says, “Dad! Look at the… the… um…. th.. .th… the… jail taxi!”
 
SEPTEMBER
Hope told me this morning that since I refer to coffee as Joe, she is going to refer to milk as Kevin. (what is it with my kids and the name Kevin?)
 
Nutella:  Because “fudge sandwich” just sounds wrong.
 
Hope and Jack are barricaded in her secret lab (her room) putting the finishing touches on their dream teleportation device (a box covered with felt and scotch tape).  They are currently in a heated debate about laser beams and launch pads (apparently love for sci-fi is genetic).
 
OCTOBER
Happy 10th birthday to my beautiful Hopey-Hope! ♥
 
It used to be that when Hope had a friend over they would play with dolls and kitchen sets.  Now they play with CD and players flip
Cameras so they can make their own music videos.  #timestheyareachangin’
 
If you say the word “gullible” slowly, it sounds like “oranges.”
 
NOVEMBER
Hope came home from school and told me she was DISAPPOINTED that PE was canceled. Who the heck does this kid belong to?!
 
Most of these protestors sound like they need to occupy a library.
 
ME: Kurt, Jack got in trouble at school – he got a color change. KURT: Man, that kid, what are gonna do wit-Well, wait – what did he do? ME: He was talking to a girl. KURT: ((silence))  ME: I SAID, he was talking to a girl. KURT: Was she cute?
 
DECEMBER
Fa la la la laaaa, la La.La.Laaaaaa!
 
ME:  Jack!  Time for bed!  JACK:  Pass….
 
Those little mirrors that they make so you can see what your baby is doing in the back seat of the car – never felt the need.  Now they are 10 and 5 and I’m getting one of those mirrors so that I can tell which kid I need to yell at.

Happy New Year to you!!